"i just cant have friends because i dont like connecting with people.
like, everyone else i've met and connected with in my life has been a cunt
why should i assume anyone else would be any different?
to assume so would just be insanity
so i just cut myself off from everyone else
there's this... disconnect from people. like, people call me a cunt all the time because i just deflect their nonsense back at them.
so when i enter a room it's like holding up a mirror to their faces and for the first time they see what it's like to be the other guy
and instead of just facing the ugly truth with dignity and pride and correcting themselves they are thrown into a tailspin of denial and just toss more ugliness my way because ugly is all they know
when the day comes that i find someone who faces the truth in stride and actually strives to be better, or better yet someone who isnt ugly like this at all, i'll know i've found either an impeccable liar or a lifelong friend
and i have a lifetime to find that person
but im not going to go out of my way to find them.
i'll soldier through, carry on, alone and isolated, wallowing in spite, until i find a reason to stop."