Worst Jokes Ever

[piefel]

Where do baby apes sleep?

In apricots


What do you get if you sit under a cow?

A pat on the head


What do birds need when they are sick?

Tweetment


How does a pig get to hospital?

In a hambulance

 

[Silverseabird]

What do you call a donkey that has three legs, one eye and plays the xylophone?

A plinky plonky winky wonkey.

What do you call a donkey that has three legs, one eye, plays the xylophone and farts way to often?

A stinky plinky plonky winky wonkey.

What do you call a donkey that has three legs, one eye, plays the xylophone, farts way to often and is being eaten by a tyranosaurus rex?

Dead.

*drops mic*

 

[ice]

What do you call an icecream...

icecream

 

[MD K47]

Two mountains collide with each other, one says to the other, "it wasn't my fault".

If you're a geologist you might have just wet your self

 

[Hirdragnur]

Rock on, MD, Rock on.

 

[Riko son of Pdor son of Kmer]

A crustacean eats a fish's tongue and replaces it.
Fish ''Has anyone seen my tongue?''
''Not me'', the crustacean says.

 

[adamrob2002]

What is blue, black and lazy?
A dead elephant

 

[stormray73]

Stormray! This is the best joke ever, please keep to the theme of "worst jokes ever"

That's one of my worst jokes ever. I haven't even gotten to some of my mormon jokes (i'm mormon. I have fair license).

 

[markbulk]

Whats hard and orange/yellow my di*k wait i mean banana

 

[#1 Medic]

These are honestly far from being the worst jokes. . . some are very excellent.

true

 

[#1 Medic]

What did the old chimney say to the Young chimney?

Aren't you too Young to smoke?

 

[Poison]

Why did the chicken cross the road?: To get run over bye a car! MWA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Pierce99]

Girl, you know how to play strip poker? You strip and I poke you. (Very dirty pickup line I used once at a cross country meet. Girl laughed xD but said no).

 

[EnderNicky]

A helicopter we're carrying 50 rocks then 50 fell off now there fiftey. How can a elephant get a big fridge? Just get in it. How can a rhino get in the fridge just get in it. Tarzan is having a party he wants to fight all the animals in the jungle what animals that weren't at the party?: The rhino and the elephant. An old lady wanted to cross this lake but there was no bridge and she was afraid to cross because of the aligators what should she do?: Just cross it because the aligators are at Tarzans party. if though the old lady can cross she died how did she die?: The 50 rocks from the helicopter killed her! MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Haha, I just heard that joke yesterday.

 

[stormray73]

I dream of a world in which a chicken may cross a road without its motives being questioned.

-Me.

 

[EnderNicky]

I dream of a world in which a chicken may cross a road without its motives being questioned.

-Me.

Already been achieved for turkeys:

 

[gombar123]

For all you guys who know Mormons: How many Mormons does it take to screw in a lightbulb: 30. 1 to do it and 29 to bring refreshments
How many princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb: 1 she holds it and the world spins around her

 

[EnderNicky]

For all you guys who know Mormons: How many Mormons does it take to screw in a lightbulb: 30. 1 to do it and 29 to bring refreshments
How many princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb: 1 she holds it and the world spins around her

I'm pretty sure someone told both of those jokes already.

 

[gombar123]

[quote user_id="10011779" avatar="https://cravatar.eu/helmavatar/gombar123/74.png" name="gombar123"]For all you guys who know Mormons: How many Mormons does it take to screw in a lightbulb: 30. 1 to do it and 29 to bring refreshments
How many princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb: 1 she holds it and the world spins around her

I'm pretty sure someone told both of those jokes already.[/quote]
D:

 

[Silverseabird]

What do you call the army band officer who got run over by a tank?

A flat major.